"A petty misunderstanding over text messages ended everything" - resonates with me. My first long term relationship ended over something so small and trivial. Of course there was a huge buildup of underlying problems that lead towards it, and while it's probably not uncommon - it's funny how it's that little spark that ignites the inevitable end.
It's funny how that happens isn't it? Always the proverbial straw that breaks the camel's back. Part of becoming wiser--wiser, not older--is, I think, recognizing those moments that start to build up on top of each other, because it's always the little things we think are too small to talk about or bring up that end up, in the end, being the source of the disintegration.
Jan 5, 2023·edited Jan 5, 2023Liked by Samuél Lopez-Barrantes
We spend so much time projecting and planning our future that when our relationships implode (or are taken apart by the natural order of things) the grief becomes timeless. We miss the person they were, the person they are in the moment, and the person we knew they could become. When they become that person, or a better one, without you, that's yet another layer of grief to contend with, one that appears much later when the dust has settled, and one that sometimes takes you by complete surprise.
Eloquently put my friend. I'm so often reminded in any given scenario how much of my expectations about the scenario--whether it's meeting someone new, reconnecting with an old friend--are based on a total illusion I've constructed in my mind. You've taught me a lot about being in the present moment, and about trying to limit the amount of pre-conceptions we bring to any given relationship. Thanks for the wisdom, friend.
This feels like the beating heart of the book—whether it stays at 1,088 words or not. A poetic homage to not-so-fairytale endings, and a heart-breaker of a post… Definitely felt compelled enough to listen (after reading) to see what I could hear between the lines. Mad respect to Yann for already dropping all the knowledge needed here, but I’ll add that hindsight’s a bitch. Sometimes we can’t see someone clearly simply because we’re standing too closely together, and it’s only in separation that we’re able to celebrate the beauty in the differences, as well as (hopefully) what they’ve become—alongside, despite, or maybe even because of us. But I’ve also been through break-ups that rendered me unable to remember the good times and questioning whether there even were any. Digging those memories out can feel like pulling shrapnel (poetic license, obviously, because wtf do I know about real pain)—and I think that I’ve also had to learn the hard way that some stories are better left buried, or untold besides to the select few.
Funny you mention that re: the beating heart. Up until this moment, the character has been searching for something elusive, and writing this chapter helped me figure out what that search is geared towards. The next chapters already feel more alive because of it. Thanks for the kind words and recognition, my writer friend. SO EXCITED to see you on this space, and to see the beauties you shall share
The great and elusive search for truth and love? Otherwise known as every poet's search... Or at least those of us who aren't entirely satisfied by easy answers, endings, or stories. It's an honor to see your words come alive and your work gather meaning here, as well as to simultaneously watch you grow and extend yourself grace--as a writer and as a human.
I can see why you champion this space and the camaraderie it seems to hold at it's heart!
"The last paragraph took me so long to get right. . ." I know that struggle well. In the case of this last paragraph--it's simply beautiful, especially hearing you read it as the character takes another literal & philosophical turn. Bravo!
"Basic needs and impossible wants" -- gorgeous and resonant turn of phrase.
that last paragraph took me so long to get right ... thanks for making it seem more worthwhile
"A petty misunderstanding over text messages ended everything" - resonates with me. My first long term relationship ended over something so small and trivial. Of course there was a huge buildup of underlying problems that lead towards it, and while it's probably not uncommon - it's funny how it's that little spark that ignites the inevitable end.
It's funny how that happens isn't it? Always the proverbial straw that breaks the camel's back. Part of becoming wiser--wiser, not older--is, I think, recognizing those moments that start to build up on top of each other, because it's always the little things we think are too small to talk about or bring up that end up, in the end, being the source of the disintegration.
We spend so much time projecting and planning our future that when our relationships implode (or are taken apart by the natural order of things) the grief becomes timeless. We miss the person they were, the person they are in the moment, and the person we knew they could become. When they become that person, or a better one, without you, that's yet another layer of grief to contend with, one that appears much later when the dust has settled, and one that sometimes takes you by complete surprise.
Eloquently put my friend. I'm so often reminded in any given scenario how much of my expectations about the scenario--whether it's meeting someone new, reconnecting with an old friend--are based on a total illusion I've constructed in my mind. You've taught me a lot about being in the present moment, and about trying to limit the amount of pre-conceptions we bring to any given relationship. Thanks for the wisdom, friend.
This feels like the beating heart of the book—whether it stays at 1,088 words or not. A poetic homage to not-so-fairytale endings, and a heart-breaker of a post… Definitely felt compelled enough to listen (after reading) to see what I could hear between the lines. Mad respect to Yann for already dropping all the knowledge needed here, but I’ll add that hindsight’s a bitch. Sometimes we can’t see someone clearly simply because we’re standing too closely together, and it’s only in separation that we’re able to celebrate the beauty in the differences, as well as (hopefully) what they’ve become—alongside, despite, or maybe even because of us. But I’ve also been through break-ups that rendered me unable to remember the good times and questioning whether there even were any. Digging those memories out can feel like pulling shrapnel (poetic license, obviously, because wtf do I know about real pain)—and I think that I’ve also had to learn the hard way that some stories are better left buried, or untold besides to the select few.
Funny you mention that re: the beating heart. Up until this moment, the character has been searching for something elusive, and writing this chapter helped me figure out what that search is geared towards. The next chapters already feel more alive because of it. Thanks for the kind words and recognition, my writer friend. SO EXCITED to see you on this space, and to see the beauties you shall share
The great and elusive search for truth and love? Otherwise known as every poet's search... Or at least those of us who aren't entirely satisfied by easy answers, endings, or stories. It's an honor to see your words come alive and your work gather meaning here, as well as to simultaneously watch you grow and extend yourself grace--as a writer and as a human.
I can see why you champion this space and the camaraderie it seems to hold at it's heart!
"The last paragraph took me so long to get right. . ." I know that struggle well. In the case of this last paragraph--it's simply beautiful, especially hearing you read it as the character takes another literal & philosophical turn. Bravo!
Thank you friend. Here's to all those years of craft courses, and approximating something resembling completion